Ventrue: "Thank you all for coming on such short notice. I’ll just do a quick head count and we’ll get started." (Looks past everyone in the room while silently counting.) "And that’s twelve. Hmmmm, it looks like we’re one short today. Where’s Ravnos?"

Brujah: "I dunno why you’re looking at me! I dunno where that little thief is! He’s probably outside stealing your horse or something..."

Lasombra: "Better check your wallet, Ventrue." (Delivers a simpering smile, but discreetly snakes a hand down to check his own as well.)

Ventrue: "There’s no need for that Lasombra, Brujah. I’m sure Ravnos is just running late." (Does a quick check to be sure his coinpurse is still firmly attached to his belt.) "Come to think of it, I haven’t seen Ravnos in quite a while. Has anybody else?"

Tzimisce: (Looks around the table, before shaking his own head.) "No, I have not zeen Rrrrravnos..."

Malkav: "I saw Ravnos. Of course, I see eeeverrrythiiiing..." (Casts a smirk towards Toreador.)

Nosferatu: (Shuffles through a stack of papers before pulling out one and skimming over it aloud.) " ‘Last seen exiting Harper’s Gentlemen’s Club with...’ No wait, excuse me, wrong person." (Looks apologetically to Ventrue, then chuckles, which quickly degenerates into a fit of phlemy coughing.) "Sorry, sorry."

Toreador: "I can’t imagine you would expect me to be seen in public with that boor—always feeling around for something or the other. Though I suppose it’s better than some." (Glares at Giovanni.)

Tremere: (Interjecting.) "I warned you of the consequences of releasing the assassin of his blood curse. But does anyone ever listen to me? Noooo..." (Glares at Haqim.)

Haqim: "Hey, I was getting hungry. Gotta let a guy drink blood… that sweet, sweet blood, thick and rich flowing from the jugular, in its crimson glory, the overwhelming smell of ambrosia... it’s just so damn good." (Sits silent for a moment.) "We were talking about what now?"

Ventrue: "RAVNOS! We’re talking about Ravnos." (Sigh.) "Ravnos never misses a meeting, so something must be wrong. Does anyone have any information at all?"

Giovanni: "Well, Ventrue, I would gladly share the information that I have, but there’s this whole treaty thing between your people and the family. Non-interference, yadda, yadda. Youse guys understand, right? Forgetaboutit. Can’t help youse guys."

Brujah: "Hey Malkav, you see everything, huh? See this!" (Punches Malkav in face, then rubs his fist.) "Just getting warmed up. Anyway, with his powers, couldn’t Ravnos be here right now? You know, like watching us?"

Ennoia: (Checks over her shoulder.) "Hrmph. I can’t say I miss him. But we don’t exactly just disappear... maybe someone killed the little runt."

Nosferatu: "Well, if you want to get technical about it, some of us do ‘just disappear.’ Send some of your people my way. Maybe I’ll teach them all about that little trick. Of course, it’ll cost ya..."

Ravnos: (Entering through the window, all grins.) "Hey guys, ya miss me?"

Ennoia: (Slugs Ravnos in the face.) "No."

Ravnos: (Raises an eyebrow and smirks. Then, in a complete deadpan) "Oh, right. Owww. That hurt." (Falls backward out the window, though the sound of impact is not heard.)

Ventrue: (Dominate to Ennoia.) "SIT DOWN!" (Strides over to the window, looks out, and sees nothing.) "Enough games, Ravnos. Come inside and tell us what happened."

Ennoia: (Sits, hard and mutters under her breath.) "Short end of the stick, I tell you. I get udders and a duck bill, and he gets to tell people what to do."

Ravnos: (Ravnos enters, this time from the closet.) "Whatcha mean, what happened? I came in through the window, and Fuzzy over there hit me, and I fell... right?"

Brujah: (Groans.) "Maybe it would be better if you were dead…"

Ravnos: "Dead? Who’s dead?" (Starts counting the others assembled in the room.) "Malkav, you didn’t kill off any of your personalities, did you?"

Malkav: (Holding his nose.) "Hardy-har-har." (Glares at Brujah.) "You know, technically, we’re all dead..."

Brujah: "Yeah but I can make you even deader…"

Malkav: (To Brujah.) "Hey, buddy, ol’ pal, ol’ friend... who’s that watching you? Can’t you see them? They’re everywhere!!"

Ventrue: "All right you two, cut it out. Ravnos, I know something is up. I was waiting for someone with more reliable sources to volunteer some information, but it doesn’t look like that will happen, so we’ll have to go with what I heard. As I understand it, an incident occurred that may have resulted in your death. Your final death. Since you stand here before us, that obviously isn’t the case. Care to fill us in?"

Ravnos: "Oh... that... well, ummm... I got better?" (Winks out of existence.)

Tzimisce: (Starts to stand.) "If zee Prankster is just rrrrrunning us all for a bad joke, then I am leaving. Besides, if Rrrrravnos does meet final death, it vould protect all of our belongings."

Set: "I don’t recall any of you calling a meeting when I wasssss thought deccceasssed."

Nosferatu: "We were hoping you w... ahem… Yes, hoping you weren’t."

Saulot: (Entering through the front door.) "And when I was dead, no one seemed concerned."

Tremere: "Hello? Time-space continuum, Saulot. You’re dead, I’m not. You can’t be here!"

Saulot: (Smiles beatifically.) "Transcend, little mage, and you will understand. Time and space mean nothing to me."

Tremere: "Riiiiight… Giovanni, a little help?"

Giovanni: (Rubbing hands together.) "Youse guys gonna give me Switzerland?"

Tremere: "I draw the line at northern Italy."

Giovanni: "Fine, fine, forgetaboutit. Hey, Saulot... Soul Steal."

Tremere: (With but a whimper, his body collapses to the ground.)

(The entire room looks at Tremere’s body, then at Saulot, and then at Giovanni. Giovanni shrugs his shoulders.)

Saulot: (Smirks.) "That’s what you get for meddling in the affairs of... healers."

Giovanni: (Looks at Saulot, then at Tremere, then back to Saulot.) "Damn. Good trick, Saulot. Bye now." (Potence kicks Saulot out the door. Looks to Tremere, who is rising, groggy.) "Hey, Tremere, that ain’t your soul in your body. Youse guys should get that checked out."

Ventrue: (Rising, looking a bit annoyed.) "Non-interference, my..." (Composes himself quickly.) "Gentlemen, ladies, can we get back to business now? Thank you."

Lasombra: "Set, think about all of us, think about you, then tell us why we didn’t call a meeting."

Malkav: "Hey Set, you should hear what Brujah just said about your mom!" (Crawls under Set’s chair.)

Set: (Sniffs haughtily.) "Brujah issss merely jealousssss. Jusssst becaussssse none of you are godsssss."

Tremere: "Make that Fallen Gods. (Chortles.)

Set: (Looks at Tremere’s chest.) "I know where your heart issssss, Tremere."

Tremere: (Turns pale for just a moment, then smirks.) "For now."

Malkav: (Sneaks under the table and steals Ventrue’s wallet.)

Toreador: "Fallen gods ... dark, yet majestic. Beautiful, yet terrible. Dreadful, yet adored. Oh, the horror! Oh, the humanity!"

Ravnos: (Only his voice, seemingly coming from nowhere, as he is nowhere to be seen.) "Oh, the angst... oh, my spleen! Ouch!"

Ennoia: "Heh. ‘Fallen gods.’" (Looks at Giovanni.)

Giovanni: (Looks at Gangrel.) "At least it’s better than being a dog."

Set: "Now... Why is Ravnossss sssstill talking to ussss?" (Looks pointedly at Giovanni.)

Giovanni: "What? Why are all of youse guys always lookin’ at me? Forgetaboutit. Anyways, what should I do about Ravnos?"

Malkav: (Riffling through the contents of Ventrue’s wallet.) Well, Gio, apparently, he’s not dead, so that rules him out, eh? Why, were you actually interested??"

Toreador: "Giovanni might as well be dead himself for all the interest he manages."

Brujah: (Grabs Malkav, slams his head against the desk a couple of times, then hands Ventrue’s wallet back to him.) "Oh come on Torrie, Giovanni ain’t that bad. I mean all he wants is Italy..." (Gets funny look from others.) "What? I dunno what the hell he’s up to!"

Toreador: (To Brujah.) "Precisely."

Tremere: (Shakes his head as he leans back.) "Seems we won’t be going anywhere for awhile..."

Tzimisce: (Sighs before taking a seat again.) "Zounds like a comic book, no one ever stays dead arrrround here."

Haqim: "Well... there is a way...though it’ll cost ya. Anyone wanna make a deal?" (Smirks.)

Ventrue: (Takes the wallet from Brujah, looking surprised that it had disappeared.) "No. No deals Haqim. I grow weary of all this." (Summons Ravnos.)

Malkav: (Blinks.) "I’m... I’m cured! The madness... it’s gone!!!!" (Lands a punch on Brujah’s jaw.) "Oh, wait, never mind."

Brujah: "Oh and THAT hurt." (Breaks Malkav’s nose.) "Don’t you think I’ve been learning Fortitude while you’ve been away talking to your bunny slippers?"

Ravnos: (Enters, this time through the front door, dressed as a pizza delivery boy.) "Uhhh... did somebody order an illusion slinging madman?"

Ennoia: (To Brujah.) "Who are you calling bunny slippers?" (Growl.) (To group.) "I say those of us who are supposed to be dead better be made really dead real soon... or there’s gonna be trouble..."

Ravnos: (Smirks in Ennoia’s direction, saying nothing.)

Malkav: "He was calling you Bunny Slippers!" (Points to Brujah.) "I think you should take him out!"

Ennoia: (Lunges at Brujah screaming. The two of them begin to roll around on the floor.)

Ventrue: (Steps past the brawling pair, and approaches Ravnos.) "All right Ravnos, SIT DOWN." (Dominate.)

Ravnos: (Sits, hard.)

Ventrue: "Now I want to know the full story about your alleged death. YOU WILL TELL ME THE TRUTH ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED." (Dominate.)

Nosferatu: (Aside.) "Somebody’s a control freak..."

Brujah: "Damn it! I didn’t..." (punch) "...call you..." (kick) "...bunny slippers!" (slap) "I was..." (biff) "...insulting Malkav!" (Fight continues.)

Malkav: (Smirks, utterly pleased, starts to sing.) "I got friends in hiiiigh places..."

Tzimisce: (Mutters under his breath.) "Fine line betveen crazy, and spoiled little Chylde. Memo to self... invent a vay to control zee onez that come overrrr to my zide... yas, verrry good."

Tremere: (Watches the happenings between Ravnos and Ventrue, and mutters under his breath.) "Curiouser and curiouser indeed... memo to self... practice ordering my lackeys about... yes, very good."

Ravnos: "Alleged death. Right. Well, you see, there was this really big... brain... in a jar with green liquid... and... wait, no, that’s not it. There was a crazy fuzzy lady, and she got really mad at me... wait, that’s not it either. Oh, right! The rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated. I’m just fine. Absolutely fine. Say, is that a cheese wheel?" (Pointing across the room.)

Nosferatu: "Well, I’m convinced, can we go now? You know, places to go, descendants to habitually slaughter, you know how it is."

Toreador: (Waves a hand listlessly in the air.) "Yes, places to see, people to do, the usual." (Looks skeptically at Nosferatu.) "Not that you’d understand, of course."

Ventrue: (Sighs, waving his hand towards the door.) "Yes, yes, we’re done. See you when the next crisis arises, I’m sure." (Toreador and Nosferatu exit.)

Gangrel: (punch) "I’ll..." (claw) "...show you..." (kick) "...Bunny..." (bite) "...Slippers!" (thump) (Fight continues.)

Brujah: "You’re..." (smack) "...worse..." (biff) "...than my..." (kick) "...ex..." (bite) "...wife!" (Fight continues.)

Ravnos: (Looks at the fight in amusement, then glances Ventrue’s direction. Seeing Ventrue distracted, Ravnos exits.)

Malkav: (Taps Ennoia and Brujah on the shoulders.) "I know you two are busy there, but I thought I’d let you know that Tzimmy just called you spoiled childer. More news at eleven."

Haqim: (Hides in the shadows collecting the blood from the floor in vials, anyone who sees him he waves off.) "Don’t mind me, I need a snack later."

Giovanni: (Takes out his wallet and looks at Set.) "So, what are the odds for the fight?" (Points at Brujah and Ennoia.)

Set: "Give me a moment..." (Pulls out a notebook and makes some quick calculations.) "Exccccellent. Sssseven to one in favor of... Brujah."

Tremere: (Reaching for his wallet.) "Hey, wait a sec. Didn’t Brujah already die once? That whole... Carthage snafu?"

Brujah: (Looking up from the fight.) "Why you little..." (Full of righteous fury, Brujah throws Ennoia across the room.)

Ennoia: (Lands on her feet on the table, claws out, in a Wolverine pose.)

Tzimisce: (Smirks.) "As I zaid, a comic book. Lasombrrrra, come along. Ve have thingz to do, planz to make, frrrreedom to crrrrrush." (Lasombra and Tzimisce exit.)

Brujah: (Pointing at Tremere.) "You and me, little mage."

Tremere: (Pointing to himself.) "Moi? Oh, gee... I’d love to, but you know how things are... busy busy busy... that’s why I’m glad I’m an Oracle of Time. Or was, once." (Shrugs.) "Eh, it’s time... it’s all relevant." (Winks out of existence.)

Haqim: (Looks around impatiently.) "Well, aren’t you guys going to keep shedding blood for me to coll... I mean, aren’t you guys going to finish this? Honor demands it, right?"

(Brujah and Ennoia look at each other for a moment, then both look at Haqim, rage in their eyes.)

Haqim: "Or not. Hey, see you all later!" (Turns to the door and bolts out.)

Set: "Yesss... well, it’ssss been lovely. Good night." (Set exits.)

Brujah: "Seven to one, my ass." (Looks at Ennoia.) "Rematch later?"

Ennoia: "Any time." (Ennoia slings her arm over Brujah’s shoulder and they exit together.)

Malkav: " ‘So, it is down to you, and it is down to me.’ Up for a battle of wits, old buddy?"

Ventrue: (Sighs, holding his head between his hands.) "Why do I bother calling these meetings? They always end like this. Malkav, am I a good leader?"

Malkav: "Hmmm… well, a wise man once said, ‘When the first living thing existed, I was there, waiting. When the last living thing dies, my job will be finished. I’ll put the chairs on the tables, turn out the light and lock the universe behind me when I leave.’ Well, technically he had a character say that. But that’s not important. In fact, that whole quote is completely irrelevant. Take it as you will. G’night, Ventrue." (Malkav exits.)

Ventrue: "Yes, good night." (Ventrue puts the chairs on the tables, turns out the light, and exits. There is the sound of a key locking the door, then nothing.)